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Incest
2003-11-24

When grandpa saw me, he flipped out. He yelled at me, saying that I should not be running around like a wild cat, that I should be helping him with the boys and what if I had broken my neck when I fell into the brook, and blah, blah, blah. He told me to take a shower and go to bed. My punishment was going to be having to go to bed without dinner. I didn’t care about that, I just wanted him to get off my case. Later on that evening, after my brother was already asleep, he came into my bedroom where I was reading a book. He carried a tray with dinner for me. To my surprise, there was the biggest slice of chocolate cake I have ever seen. He was very stingy with the sweets so I was very grateful for this odd mercy. He sort of apologized for his yelling earlier, put the tray on the nightstand and said he’d be back for it later. I wolfed down the food and turned the light off, pretending to be asleep, as I didn’t want to talk to him again. Much later, I must have dozed off, for I don’t remember him coming into the room. All of a sudden, I woke up and felt somebody lying in the bed with me. I knew immediately that it must have been grandpa by the size of the body that was pressing against my back. My brother and I had never had a habit of sleeping in the same bed, so I knew it wasn’t him. I felt his hands slip under my pajama top and rest on my breasts, which at the time were non-existent.

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I jumped a little and he told me to just lay still. He said that we’d play a little game. I didn’t say a word as I was always told to be obedient, especially to my elders, and had been smacked around a few times for talking back and not doing what I was told. We lay there for a while, his one hand on my breast, and the other one on my shoulder. Then, he told me that the bed will shake a little bit, but this was just our little game and I shouldn’t be scared. He started pushing himself against me, grabbing my shoulder so tight that I let out a little cry, which made him push against me harder and faster. All of a sudden, he let go of me, threw the blankets off of us and pulled down my pajama bottoms. I tried to protest but at the first sound of it, he smacked my bottom so hard that I almost hit the ceiling. I was still lying with my back towards him and he told me to just keep still. He lay on his back, grabbing and squeezing my butt cheeks and the bed started to shake really hard. Later on I figured out that he was jerking off, but at the time I didn’t know what was happening, it felt very wrong, he could see my butt, he was touching it and I was grossed out. But, I just lay there with my eyes shut and finally he groaned and cursed and then, everything was still. After awhile he pulled the cover back over us and turned me towards him. The light in the room was off, but I could see him from the glow of the porch light through the shades. He told me that this was our little game, our little secret and that I shouldn’t be telling anybody about it.

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I just nodded and he got out of the bed, putting on his pajama bottom, making sure I saw his limpy dick and skinny ass and left. The following night he didn’t come into my room and I very foolishly taught that this would never happen again. I even started wondering if it really happened. But, it did. I was taking a bath the following evening and all of a sudden he walked in the bathroom, went over to the toilet, and facing me pulled out his dick and peed. I tried not to look, terrified and disgusted. When he was done, he walked over to the bathtub and told me that we have to get used to each other like this as this is a little house and we do not have the luxury of more than one bathroom. Then he leaned over, landed his hand on my breast and roughly squeezed what wasn’t even there. Then he straightened up and walked out. Two nights later, he came into my room again, this time I was still up reading and laid in the bed next to me. This was a guest room and the bed was gigantic, as most of his visitors were couples. He turned towards me and asked me if I would like the light on or off. I told him I wanted it off and he happily obliged. Years later, I realized that with questions like that and constant repetition of ‘our game’, he psychologically involved me into it all and made it hard for me to ever tell anyone. He kicked the covers off us and knelt next to me.

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He pulled down my pajama bottoms and threw them on the floor. He hiked up my top and covered my face with it so that I couldn’t see anything. Again, the whole story of our game came into play and he told me to just lay still, do as he says and it’ll be over soon. I could hear the elastic pop and felt bumping around the bed as he took his pajamas off. He grabbed my ankles and pushed my legs so that he doubled me over and my feet were touching the pillow on the both sides of my head. He placed his arm on my knees, so that his elbow was pushing against one back of my knee and the palm of the same arm against the other. The bed as well as my body started shaking, I felt terrified and utterly silly. It was an uncomfortable and very embarrassing position. Every once in a while I could feel him smacking me with his dick. He jerked off for a while and then blessedly groaned and cursed again. I could feel something hot and wet hit the back of my thighs. Before he let me go, he wiped my legs with his pajama bottom and then lay next to me. He pulled my top off my face and kissed me on the mouth. He said that I was a very good girl. The following day my uncle and auntie came to visit us and as they were approaching the cottage, he told me to keep quiet about our little game.

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I just nodded and never ever said anything to anyone. I did ask my uncle if I could go home, but he said no, I had to look after my brother. For a couple of weeks, grandpa would come into my room almost every night, jerking off; he began leaving the light on and making me look at what he was doing. If I closed my eyes or looked away, he would slap me. He would make me stand by the side of the bed, push my pajama bottoms down to my ankles and make me bend forward, while he was sitting or lying on the bed behind me, whacking off like a madman. Every morning after the time when he peed in front of me, he would come into the kitchen when I was washing the dishes, pulling down my jeans and panties, squeezing my ass sometimes so hard that I cried. Then, all of a sudden he would turn around and walk out, leaving me in the kitchen with my jeans around my ankles, crying and feeling humiliated. About two weeks later, when he came to my room and laid next to me, he told me he was going to teach me some things so that our game would be even better. He kissed me gently first, then covered my entire mouth with his lips and pushed his tongue deep inside, almost gagging me. He kept kissing me like that and I remember I couldn’t breathe properly. His hands slid down my body and under my pajama bottoms. His hand forced itself between my thighs and he placed it on my crotch. I was out of breath and completely alarmed and he assured me that it’s okay, everybody does that; they just don’t talk about it. He started massaging my pussy and pressing his pelvis against me at the same time.

Then he knelt beside me, took my pajama bottoms off and made me spread my legs.

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He sucked on his fingers for awhile and then placed them on my clitty, which again almost made me hit the ceiling. I remember him grinning stupidly throughout that night. He kept rubbing my clitty, first softly and then roughly, my legs twitching without any control as it felt absolutely bizarre and wrong, but my body seemed to have a mind of its own and he told me that my pussy was wet for him and again, what a good girl I was. He kept rubbing me and my legs were twitching, but (much later I realized) I could not come and eventually he stopped. He knelt over me and then sat on my stomach, his ass pressing against my pelvis and showed me how to jerk him off. I did it, just like he told me to, going faster when he told me to go faster, slower when I should go slower and eventually he tensed and groaned, spraying all over my titties. I thought that was the end of that for the evening, as he usually left afterwards, but this time, he laid next to me, smearing his cum all over my body, kissing me on the mouth and licking his cum off my titties. He did that for what seemed like forever, his hand again slipping down my body, forcing my legs to spread open and rubbing my clitty. After a while, he stopped, lay next to me and went to sleep hugging me so tight that I couldn’t even move. Needless to say, I could not go to sleep, listening to his heavy breathing, feeling his limp dick against my thigh and hoping that my uncle and auntie would come and take me home. He awoke a few hours later (probably, I didn’t keep a track of time) and the whole thing of clitty rubbing began. Then, he told me to kneel with my face into the pillows, my ass high in the air towards him. He knelt behind me, rubbing my clitty with one hand and caressing my ass with the other. All of a sudden, I could feel a finger press against my ass hole. It kept pressing harder and I could feel it slide in a little bit.

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It hurt me and I cried and jumped up. At that point he smacked me really hard and pushed me back on the pillows. He told me to stay like that, for he figured that I didn’t want to wake my brother and he would see what I am doing. So I lay back on the pillows, and resumed the clitty rubbing and pushed his finger back into my ass. I cried quietly into my pillows, as it hurt and I felt very humiliated. He pushed the finger in and out of my ass in synchronicity with the rubbing of my clitty. All of a sudden, he let go of me for a moment, sliding over the bed, opening the nightstand and taking out a jar of Vaseline that used after washing dishes. He told me to watch him and from the awkward position that I was in I did, as I did not want him to hit me again. He opened the jar and took a big blob of Vaseline, smearing it on his - now hard and to my eyes huge dick. Then he took out another blob of Vaseline and smeared it on my ass hole, slipping his finger in, greasing my insides. Then he grabbed my hips and I could feel his dick being positioned on my ass hole. He told me to be very still and to inhale deep. I inhaled, then as he told me to exhale I did that too and felt his grasp on my hips tighten as he pushed his dick inside of me. The pain was unbelievable and I screamed, which was immediately followed by a hard smack. He told me to shut up, again emphasizing that I didn’t want my brother to wake up.

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He stayed still for a while until I stopped whimpering and then pulled it out slightly and pushed it back in. I cried again, but this time, he did not hit me. He just pulled and pushed again a few times. He moaned and groaned, telling me how good this felt and that it will start feeling good for me too, soon. He kept telling me how good of a girl I was and kept fucking me in my ass, while I thought I was going to pass out from the incredible pain. After what seemed like an eternity, he finally pulled out, grabbed my ankles, pulling me on my stomach and flipping me over, cumming all over my tummy. After that he got off the bed, told me to go to the bathroom and clean myself up and staggered out of my bedroom. I remember going to the bathroom after I heard his bedroom door shut, crying, still in pain. I took a shower and was horrified to see that I was bleeding. The next morning when my brother was playing outside after breakfast and I hadn’t gotten to escape out yet, he came into the kitchen while I was washing the dishes, and stood behind me, hugging me. I was horrified to see that he brought the Vaseline jar with him again. He made me stand on a little footstool that my brother used when he tried to get to the cookies and leaned me over the kitchen counter, my face in the window, so that I could see my brother playing outside. There were heavy curtains on the windows so that you could see out, but could not see inside if you were standing in front of the house. He unzipped and pulled down my jeans and panties, unzipped his pants and let them fall down to his ankles, put Vaseline on his dick and up my ass hole and repeated the entire ‘inhale-exhale’ thing. He pushed his dick inside my ass, grabbing one of my shoulders with one hand, placing the other hand over my mouth and fucked me so hard that a couple of times I actually felt myself fainting.

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The burning pain in my ass was unbelievable and I could feel my stomach cramping up. He fucked me really hard while I cried and watched my little brother in alarm should he decide to come back inside. I know I was screaming, but he muffled my screams with his hand, and the more I screamed the harder he fucked me. All of a sudden he stopped, stepping out of his pants completely, grabbing me by the arm and dragging me into my bedroom, while I staggered as I could barely walk with my jeans around my ankles and searing pain in my stomach. He locked the door behind us as we entered, told me to take off my jeans, which I did, still crying. He pushed me on the bed, pushed my legs up so that I was doubled over and pushed his dick inside my ass again. He fucked me very hard, groaning after each thrust, my head pressed against the headboard, the bed creaking perversely. Finally, after what seemed like hours to me, although I’m certain it was only minutes, he came, this time inside of me. He thrust deeper than he ever did, pushing his entire weight on my small body and kept pushing in a mad rush without even pulling out. I kept crying, trying not to scream and then I could feel his dick pulsating in my ass and warm wetness, which at first I thought was my blood, but later realized it was his cum. When he was done, he got up, told me to wash up and go back to bed, as I wasn’t in any state to go outside that day. I stayed in bed all day, my stomach cramping up and my ass burning from the morning violation. In the evening, he came into my room and told me to come downstairs to eat dinner. At first I tried to tell him that I was not hungry, but the way he looked at me, I could not do anything but get up and go to dinner. After we finished the meal, he sent my brothers to bed and made me sit down in front of the TV with him, watching something that I could not pay any attention to.

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After about an hour, he finally got up, and told me to come with him. I did so, shuffling my feet, hoping that nothing bad or painful would happen again. He took me to the bathroom, took off my clothes and his and we took a shower together.

He soaped my entire body, made me soap him up and then washed us both off. Then, he knelt in front of me and told me to spread my legs. As I did that, to my horror, he pushed his face between my legs and started licking and sucking my clitty. My body responded to the stimulation and I could feel my legs going weaker and twitching, while I had to grab onto his shoulders or I would have fallen. His sucking became very intense and he was hurting me, but I just stood there, feeling my pussy swelling with excitement. After awhile I started crying as his sucking became very painful, he stood up abruptly, annoyed. I didn’t realize what he was trying to do, but I guess at the time I was too young for an orgasm, which made him very angry. He made me kneel in front of him this time, trying to make me take him into my mouth. I fought wildly, turning my head from one side to another, and finally he gave up. He took me by the hand, roughly pulled me off my knees and led me through the house naked, into my room, where he laid me on the bed, pushed my legs over my head and fucked me in the ass again, saying “Come on, come on!” each time he slammed inside of me. It still hurt a lot, but he did not fuck me as hard as he did that morning and he came blissfully quickly. From that day on, he would sleep in my room every night, except when our family was visiting.

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He would not fuck me every night, but he most certainly would be slipping his fingers roughly in and out of my ass, rubbing and sucking my clitty trying to make me come, which always left him frustrated as my young body was not capable of doing that. After two months of horror I went home and never told anyone about what had happened. I did try to tell my friend at one time, but she on one hand didn’t seem too interested, on the other hand she didn’t really know what I was talking about, since I couldn’t bring myself up to explain in simple terms and I gave up on telling. A few years later, I must have been about 16, I was sent to the cottage during the winter holidays by myself. My cousin Tina was 18 at the time and has already been there for a week. We were to spend a couple of weeks together, skiing on the small hill behind the cottage. I took the bus and walked the rest of the way to the cottage, carrying my skis and backpack. When I got to the cottage, I couldn’t see Tina in the back and I had this horrible feeling that something was not quite right. Grandpa knew what time I would be coming and I thought that he would be waiting for me. I leaned the skis against the cottage outside, took my boots off and quietly slipped through the door. As I entered, the cottage seemed empty at first, but then I heard shuffling in the room upstairs where the bedrooms were. I slowly crept up the stairs and could now make out grandpa’s voice, commanding and full of lust, so familiar to my ears. I peeked around the corner and froze in horror. Tina stood bent over the writing desk, completely naked, with grandpa leaning over her back, one of his hands on her mouth muffling the crying, the other hand over her eyes. He knew exactly when I was coming and was ready for me.

He was fucking her slowly, but I could see that each time he slammed inside of her, he did it very hard. As if knowing that I was there, he turned towards me, looking at me and all he said was “Be still!” I knew he wanted me to stand there and watch them, and I did exactly that. At the same time, Tina didn’t know that the command was for me, she couldn’t see me from her eyes being covered by his huge hand. He fucked Tina’s pudgy body with deliberate long and hard strokes, grinning stupidly at me. She was holding onto the desk as if her life depended on it, her muffled screams searing through my entire body. Then, he started to pound her faster, and then faster still, all the time looking at me. Suddenly, his face grimaced, he pulled out, turned Tina towards him, making sure that her back was towards me and she couldn’t see me. He pushed her on her knees and came into her face while her now free mouth let out blood curdling scream. I could see she was bleeding. When he was done, he motioned for me to go away. I slipped down the stairs and out of the house, waiting stupidly at the end of the driveway for him to come and get me. It must have been some twenty minutes before he finally came out, fully dressed, and picked up my skis. “You better keep your mouth shut!” was all that he said and led me inside the house. Tina was in the kitchen, pretending as if she was cooking, and when I came in to say hello I saw that her face was red with crying. She said hello, not looking at me.

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I didn’t say anything else, nor did she. We have never discussed what I had witnessed. That winter, he took me into the shed twice, undressing me, fucking me in the ass with his finger, rubbing my clitty and telling me that he was saving his strength for the little piglet inside – piglet of course, being Tina. I could hear him every night after we were supposed to turn the lights off slipping in the room where Tina slept. There were shuffling sounds, muffled crying and screams, with the bed creaking and headboard slamming against the wall on the other side of my room. I guess he chose Tina over me as she did things that I didn’t want to. I know that because he showed me. He took me to his bedroom one evening, and made me sit in the huge antique closet with lights on in the corner on the other side of the otherwise dark room. He told me to be quiet, watch and learn, and left the closet door slightly ajar; I could see what was going on in the room, but they could not see me. He brought Tina in, made her kneel next to the bed, suck his dick, then he bent her over the chair and fucked her in the ass. I could see her face, frowned in pain and discomfort, and his face lit up in ecstasy and hideous malice. Every once in a while he would look into the closet where I was, and I remember cringing deeper into the darkness of my safe haven. He was pounding her viciously, saying “Come on, come on” every time he rammed into her, but just like me, I don’t think she actually came. After that, he left me alone, but every once in a while during the day, he would tell me to leave, and some half an hour later, Tina would emerge from the house, her face red and puffy. I kept my mouth shut as this way I was left alone.