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Fearing Your Real Self

Gay
2006-08-14

“Strip naked and submit!”  The voice cried out in the vast darkness.   Then as if my obedience was pre ordained, I complied and standing naked in the darkness, I replied, “Take me. ”
It had been a bad dream of mine for years.   A horror filled fantasy of lust and revenge and rape.   I had dreamed of it since I was twelve and now that I was twenty-two and out of college, the nightmare repeated itself even more frequently.   I still remember the cold chilling feelings running through my body as I would awake from each episode covered in sweat and trembling.  
The night became my enemy and I fought it and sleep until exhaustion would take me and for no more than two or three hours I would pass out nightly.   The effects of my dreams were now invading my normal life and I knew I needed help.   SO I went to see two doctors and shrink and all three said the same thing, “Take this magic pill and forget it. ”  I didn’t take them but I did heed part of their advice, “why don’t you plan on going somewhere happy. ”  So I booked a cabin in the mountains and headed there for the weekend.
I had saved my money from work and I was single, for a guy who can survive on little to eat, I managed to hold back a few thousand in reserve, so I had the cash to spend.   I packed up and drove up to the resort and after checking in, I relaxed on the secluded deck on the hot tub, so much so, I fell asleep.
I must have slept over half an hour because when I awoke I was wrinkled like a prune.   I climbed out feeling refreshed and then dressed and sat back in the rocker on the deck and just watched the day slowly drift by.   I was feeling somewhat better and I had no ideal why, but I was enjoying it greatly.

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    When the sun began to sink my hunger grew so I slipped inside ordered a pizza and waited.
Thirty minutes later a man in his early forties arrived with my food.   At first I opened the door completely unafraid or even thinking.   I had a twenty in my hand and gave it for the box and as I started to turn to close the door he softly spoke, “Hey cutie, that’s a big pizza to at all alone, maybe you need someone else to help feed you. ”
I was standing there all 5’9” of me, my slender build and brown short hair still wet, as I allowed my gray eyes to look into his.   Now I was fair skinned and naturally smooth almost everywhere, even in my black silk basketball shorts my legs were fuzzy at best as he could see.   I didn’t give the appearance of anything that I could think of, especially that of a gay male.   I had been with girls though never further than heavy petting, and I never had been with a man except in my dreams.   The words the man spoke didn’t anger me, but instead, as I think back now, they intrigued me.
He was 6’2” 200 pounds of a sort muscular dark tanned nature, his salt and pepper hair and eyebrows over his dark brown eyes made him look like a wizard almost.   His semi rough expression was not attractive but not ugly either.   He wasn’t wearing a uniform but tight jeans dirty and sort of worn looking and shirt that was semi undone and as he stood there, I replied, “Maybe I could. ”  That was all I could say, and as the words slid off my mouth, I realized that I didn’t reject him.   That momentary confusion gave him pause to reply as well.
Sensing my mood he said, “You ever try a supreme pizza?”
The question made me snap out of my own self-examination-mood as I responded with, “Yes once, it was great but pepperoni is always cheaper and just as good.

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  ”
“What if I offered you a supreme for free?  I mean what if I came back later on with a supreme at no charge?  Would you try it?  Would you consider it?” he said in a way that told me it wasn’t food he was thinking about.
I was so stupid and simple minded then that I blurted out, “Maybe I could try some later on. ”
He smiled at me and slid his hand on the door and held it from me closing it as he said, “I will be back around midnight sugar. ”
With those words he left and I watched him all the way out of the driveway.   I was standing there in shock really, at him and myself as I backed away finally closing but not locking the door.   I wandered into the dining area and started to engulf the pizza, but I only managed to eat two slices before I put the rest in the refrigerator.   Then as I pondered over the events earlier I found myself go into the bathroom, shave, brush my teeth, scrub my body in the shower then primp and fiddle around with my hair before I knew that somehow this guy had triggered something inside me.
I picked out several sets of clothes before I settled on my silk shorts again, and nothing else.   I walked around and straightened up the living room and turned off and down the lights and then as I heard the sound of an engine pulling in I looked to see that the time was now two minutes before midnight.   I quickly lit three candles on the table and then settled down on the leather sofa to wait.  
When he knocked, my mind began to race as it tried desperately to talk me out of this.   A part of me, the straight part wanted nothing to do with him.   However, the other part of me, the hidden part wanted to find out.   It was what I had been driving me insane for months and now suddenly it had ample opportunity to express itself.   I sat there a few seconds then I chimed out with, “It’s open for you.

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  ”
The door then slowly crept open as it did, he slowly moved through the threshold carrying a small pizza box.   He was dressed the same except that his shirt was unbuttoned to his waist and his belt was removed and his clasp opened as he walked in and shut the door behind him.   Then he moved towards me and sat the pizza on the coffee table in front of me.   As if he could read my thoughts he slid slowly down beside me as he said, “I think you are so lucky tonight. ”
“Why’s that?” I asked puzzled by his sudden statement.
“You are going to live your fantasy,” he said as he swept his right arm around my body and yanked my mouth to his where our lips met and his tongue swept into my mouth and swirled madly inside me.
I started to force him away at that moment as he frightened me, but as his mouth swished within mine; his hands slid to my chest and slowly caressed my nipples giving me a thrill unexplainable or expected.   With each touch, I slipped further under his control, until I felt myself sighing aloud, “Oh god that feels wonderful. ”
His hands had already removed my last resistance to him and as his mouth began to lap my neck and he nibbled giving me a hickey, I stuttered out, “Oh god I feel…I feel…like…like…I want…I need…”
He sensed my meaning and as he pulled back for a second he slid me on my back on the sofa then his hands removed more shorts as he slid his mouth between my legs and found my six inch cock hard shaven and ready.   He expertly sucked the tip and licked it as his fingers on his right hand tormented my nipples and his left hand caressed and toyed with my balls and asshole.   He sucked me like nothing I ever imagined could.   When he started bobbing up and down on my cock I began to caress his hair and sigh and coo and finally shout, “Oh hell yes, suck my dick.   Suck my dick.   Please suck my dick. ”
He did and as he sucked me his thumb slid ever gently into my asshole and with its full entry came a cry from me of lust and love and desire, and a second after it came a fluid release from my cock.

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    He sucked on it draining me of my cum and as he did his thumb thrust in and out making me vibrate and cry louder.   When my cock had been drained fully he moved upwards and the glistening cream on his lips was devoured by me instantly and when we kissed his warm salty surprise that I had given him swirled in our mouths and to my surprise I enjoyed its flavor and experience.
Then he stood and removed his clothes full for me.   When he stripped off his jeans and allowed his eight inch meaty cock to flop down my eyes fixed upon it.   I slid my left hand to touch the tip of it as I slid of the sofa and on my knees and moving forwards I leaned over and examined his cock.   It was cut like mine, and his head was pink and silky smooth to my fingers, his shaft though experienced was relatively unscarred.   It did have several purple veins and high ridges on the sides as my fingers slowly caressed it length and when I lifted it upward and saw the bulging vein in the middle my mouth sank over the tip and I returned the favor his mouth had done for me.   I inhaled and engulfed it as far as it would go several times, and I used my tongue to bathe and caress it for him as I settled into a very long loving oral movement.   He enjoyed my mouth fully and for the next twenty or so minutes I enjoyed sucking his cock like a ice cream cone.  When he began to spurt small drops of hardy salty cream, I prepared myself for his climax.   Yet when it happened I was gagged by it and almost choked on its heavy thick massive load.
Then as I drained his cum and tried to gather up the seeping portions while I continued to suck him dry, I realized how much I wanted this to happen.   Afterwards he pulled me from knees and into his arms where he licked and kissed and nibbled on my neck and face as he slowly said, “Oh yes young man, you were very good for a beginner.   Now after some more practice I think you may be ready to enjoy even more of my body. ”
Using his hands he slid me back down to my knees and then pulled my mouth to his cock.

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    I eagerly sucked it in, limp and softer than before I began to suck and fondle it as I also sucked and fucked around with his balls in my mouth several times.    He seemed really excited each time I sucked on his cock head while I fondled his balls and when he began to harden many minutes later.   Well I began to wonder what it would feel like in me.
I didn’t have to wait to long for as soon as he was semi hard, I was yanked by my head and flung over the coffee table beside the now cooling pizza, as he knelt behind me and began to lick and ream my asshole out with his tongue.   Then a few minutes later and I felt a massive hardening thrust in my ass.   It caught me off guard, and it made me whimper slightly but it also felt good, sort of pain and pleasure combined in a way that was wonderful.   His body slammed into my   ass hard with repeated motions and when he began to get his rhythm up he ordered me, “Take a piece of pizza from the box and cum on it slave. ”
I pulled one as he pounded my ass and placed it near my cock as my hand began to jerk me off, while his cock pounded harder still in my ass.   He fucked me without mercy and pause and as he built for an epic explosion I also began to feel my climax approach.   When he somehow took a slice of pizza from the box and slapped it on my lower back, I knew what was going to happen and when I came just as he did, I jerked my creamy surprise on the piece under me as he did the one that was on my back.  
He pumped his cum on it and some splattered on my back warming me as I cooed from my hand job.   Then he slid the pizza to my mouth and slapped the one I filled face down on the one he filled and I ate them both down to the crust without stopping.  
Then he pulled me to the outside deck and shoved me into the hot tub and as we splashed in his warm body slithered beside mine and we kissed as he fondled my nipples, cock and balls and ever so often my asshole.   I too returned the favor and played with his cock and balls until well past three in the morning.
When he extracted me from the tub, I was flung over the metal and glass patio table and then butt fucked like a dog in heat until this time he came deep inside me.

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    His hardy meaty cock filled me completely and though it was painful it was also quite pleasurable.   I enjoyed its hot surprise and wanted more.   He knew this and now seeing that the night was nearing four, he turned me on my back slid me on the table and began to orally please me again.   I was heard shrieking for more as he sucked my cock with such force and desire that I easily came in his mouth.
Then he surprised me fully by yanking me from the table to his cock and face fucking me until his cock hardened and his cum filled my mouth.   He pounded my mouth holding my head the entire time.   He sent waves of cum in me and then as if he were very satisfied with me, he fed me the remnants from my cheeks with the tip of his dick.   I lapped it all off and cleaned it never minding the taste at all even the scent of my ass on his cock.
I knew then what this meant for me and my future.   I knew then that I needed this and more and no longer being afraid of it as I stood up, I began to confess, and “I want more of you.   I want you to fuck me anytime you want to.   I know we are far apart in age and distance, but I will drive here or wherever you wish anytime you want to be yours. ”  Over the next few minutes I told him my dreams and my fears and now my desires as well.
Then he smiled and said firmly, “Oh god yes son, you are mind now.   You will be mine but you will not be far apart from me.

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    Tomorrow at nine in the morning, you will check out and drive to the address I leave for you.   Once there you will park you car and go inside the front door.   Then you walk to the back room, and there you will strip to your underwear and then walk downstairs, through the door in the far corner of the room.   Then I will come to you and tell you what you must do next.   I may be an hour or two or three before I get there, so slip the black hood over your head and tie it and then place yourself on your knees at the table until I arrive. ”    Then he led me inside kissed me many times, and even gnawed on my tits and dick before he wrote a short message with the address and slipped on his pants and shoes and left.
The next few hours went by in a very long manner, it was already six thirty when he left and though I was sort of tired, I stayed up and showered shaved and packed.   I had everything in my car and ready at ten minutes before nine and by the time nine clicked away, I was leaving the office and heading towards the address he scribbled on a piece of paper before he left.
It took me half an hour to find the address, as it was far out of the beaten path.   It was sort of a run down old two story farm house.   The weathered painted walls cried for more attention as did the overgrown front and side yards.   The dirty windows hid any sign of a presence and when I opened the dilapidated screen door, it almost fell off on me.   Then I slowly trudged inside the dirty dusty abandoned looking place.   The furniture that was there was filthy and rotten and the moldy odor meant no one lived here at all.   I walked slowly into the back room and found the door leading downstairs.

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    As I peeled off my jeans and tank top, I had this longing and sudden sense of desire over take me.   I tossed my clothes across the room into the nasty sink then I sent my shoes flying in with them and as I bravely walked down the dimly lightened steps, I began to get extremely horny.
I found the basement slightly lit by cracks in the floor boards above and a streak of light from the open door.   As I walked across the packed dirt floor I found an old wooden table covered with patches of wax, paint and what I could best determine as cum stains.   I found a black hood there and as I pulled it over my head, I knelt and let my imagination run wild.   I sat there on my knees for a very long time, and I could barely control myself.   I wanted to be ravaged, after fearing it for so long, I now wanted it to happen more than anything.
Sometime much later on I began to get so horny that even the smallest of gentle breezes sent me shivering and my cock throbbing.   I slowly started mumbling aloud, “Oh please fucking take me and rape me.   Please fuck me and suck me and do anything else to me you wish. ”
Then a long pause of no sounds and uncontrollable lust over took me and I began to jerk on my cock.   I had it hard and in my hands for only a few seconds when I started spurting my pre cum.   I slapped my free hand under it and jerked it off on my open palm, as I blurted out, “Oh fucking yes, I wish it were you doing it to me. ”  Then I ran my hand under the hood and lapped off the cram from my palm.   I licked it all and wanted more.

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    I squeezed and pushed to get all of it from my cock that I could before I felt it stop.   Then I relaxed for a few minutes before I began to grow tired and sleepy.
I drifted off into a sleepy state and when I fell forward and struck the edge of the table it woke me and I sat back up.   Then without peaking I began to hear noises from around me.   I allowed it to happen to me and when the sounds began to take the shape of footsteps I panted and my heart raced and I grew horny and hard quickly.
Sometime after the footsteps ended I heard heavy breathing, as if it were intended to arouse me, which it did easily.   Then I heard the sound of someone sigh and moan lowly and I felt something brush my back.   Then a deep voice calmly called out, “You did as told and that is good.   Now stand strip off your shorts and present your naked flesh to me.   Swear to be my slave and possession then I will remove your mask and take you as you desire. ”
I quickly tried to stand up quickly and almost passed out and as I fell over the table, two hands ripped away my shorts and kicked my legs wide.   I managed to yelp out, “I am your slave, take me and use me forever. ” Then I felt a wet wiggling tongue enter my asshole and ream its way inside me full and then as a hard warm fleshy cock rammed in my ass off my came my hood.
I looked back at my attacker but to my shock and surprise it wasn’t the man who had come there.   Instead was a young big black man with a bald head and tattoos on his arms and he was massive.

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    His cock was up inside me deeper and that felt twice as big as the other man had.   Suddenly another set of hands clutched my head and turned me to see the man, Trent, whom I had intended to submit to.   He held my head as he told me, “My slaves will have the honor of your ass, while I will get the pleasure of your mouth. ”
With that another young man similar in build to the black man came into my sight and as he stroked his nine inch Latin dick, I peered at it in lust.   Trent didn’t seem to mind as he removed the table and inserted his cock in my mouth.   Then I was double fucked for the first of many times that night.   Trent holding my head and fucking my wanting mouth while the stranger rear ended me, lowly told me, “I think I will just keep you as my prisoner for a few weeks or months, maybe a year.   Then over time I will sell you or trade you for fresh meat.   Until then your body belongs to me. ”
The black man came first and pulled his cock out and bathed my ass and back with his hot cream.   The Latin man licked me clean and then he began to fuck my ass all while I sucked and was face fucked by Trent.   When Trent was ready to dump his load, I began to sense it and eager to help I used my hand to stroke it all out and swallow the entire load.   That made him sigh heavily and then as he did I felt the Latin man behind me begin to explode on my ass like the other had.   It was a wild wicked feeling of hot cum in on and all over me.   When he finished I was spun around to find a third man, much older than the other two but younger than Trent standing there peering at me.

 

    When he saw what he wanted my cock was engulfed in his mouth and he sucked me like a baby on a nipple until I quickly unloaded in his mouth.  
As I was being guided back towards the table this time I was placed on my back.   The Black man forced apart my legs and drove his huge fat ten inch cock deep in my ass and began to pound me, while the man who had sucked me fed his cock to me.   I sucked him while Trent played with cock and balls like squeaky toys.   His hands found my nipples and soon he had me hard and then just as the man in my mouth began to cum, I felt my older lover bite down on my cock head and suck me.   A few seconds more and the stranger came in me fully and then started to kiss me and nibble on my neck as his fingers toyed with my nipples.   Trent had me seeping cream just as the black man shouted out a heavy climax was coming my way.   His load blasted onto my belly and over my cock and as it did my cock now freed from Trent’s mouth exploded on my belly as well.   Then Trent and the older man fed it to me on their cocks like candy.
The Latin boy took control of my ass and fucked me while I sucked Trent hard and then after the boy came Trent did as well.   They repeated their love making until all three of them were satisfied and Trent as well.
Then I was led upstairs out into an old panel van and blindfolded and hogtied and tossed inside.   They drove me to their place, a house not far from there where they confined me in a closet for the night.   Over the next few months I became accustomed to being spanked and sucked and fucked in both ends and servicing their needs anytime of day or night they wanted me.  
When they were sure that I was trained correctly, I was let out of the closet and shackled with a collar that they could direct me with and I was taught to be their slave.

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    In no time I understood that being naked was natural and getting fucked was enjoyable, as well as being sucked is.  
Trent kept his word and with the passing of two years of slavery, I was traded to man that flew me on a private jet to his custom villa in the jungles of Africa.   Here I have become happy being used and abused and serve willingly as his sex toy.   How long this will last is up to my owner but for now, Jock is happy with my ass and mouth.  .

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